Child's Play 3 (1991) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner]

August 25, 1991

While Child's Play 2 was a zesty surprise, Child's Play 3 was not. Screenwriter Don Macini has said in interviews that this film suffered from being rushed into production and slapped together, rather than be given the needed creative time to develop into something that could justify its own existence.

That was not to be, though. While somewhat entertaining, Child's Play 3 still looks and feels like the generic paint-by-the-numbers quickie sequel that, at its heart, it is. The noticeable and undeniable step down in quality from Child's Play 2 caused the movie to underperform at the box office and the burgeoning franchise went on a brief hiatus.
 

Strange Brew (1983) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner]

August 21, 1983

It's Bob and Doug McKenzie, eh. If you want to avoid being either a knob or a total hoser, I suggest you crack open either a can or a bottle of favorite brew, put your feet up, and enjoy this utterly nonsensical and hilarious comedy. One that has just the teeniest, tiniest splash of science fiction foam and an oh-ever-so-light dusting of gothic horror imagery (i.e. Elsinore Castle).

Don't want to see it, or have no interest in seeing it? Then take off, eh!
 

Darkman (1990) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner]

August 19, 1990

I am pretty sure Darkman is my all time favorite Sam Raimi movie. An almost perfect blending of the operatic angst of the eternally suffering masked super hero with the high energy slapstick of The Three Stooges, covered with just the slightest dusting of gothic horror. I loved this movie just about from frame one. 

Seeing the late Jessie Lawrence Ferguson, who I knew from John Carpenter's Prince of Darkness, kick things off in the small, but nonetheless important, role of Eddie Black warmed my heart. Couple that with my eagle eye spotting director William Lustig in the nearby mob of menacing dock hands and I knew Raimi was not turning his back on the horror franchise that had catapulted him into the Hollywood system.
 

The Island of Dr. Moreau (1996) - Newspaper Ad [Oakland Tribune]

August 18, 1996

This another fine example of one the most unique cinematic sub-genre offerings for the dedicated film geek. A movie where the story of its troubled production might be more interesting and entertaining than the film itself.

What began as Richard Stanley's first modest-to-large budget studio production ended as a messy and uneven patchwork credited to John Frankenheimer. For full details, I heartily recommend watching the David Gregory helmed documentary Lost Soul: The Doomed Journey of Richard Stanley's Island of Dr. Moreau. A work that is every bit as fascinating and confounding as Hearts of Darkness: A Filmmaker's Apocalypse. The major difference between the two being that Apocalypse Now survived its production to become a critical and commercial hit, while The Island of Dr. Moreau... did not.

The big surprise when I uncovered and researched this ad was learning that David Thewlis had played the shellshocked protagonist Edward Douglas. His performance in the film led me to making an observation to a friend that "throughout the film he looks palpably disgusted and seems to be trying to wish himself to be any other place than where he is."

Thinking on it now, I cannot tell if that was a performance choice or not. I doubt Thewlis would ever deign to answer if asked.

I think I need to watch Lost Soul again, pronto...
 

The Fan (1996) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner]

August 11, 1996

Not a remake of the 1981 Lauren Bacall starring pseudo-slasher, adapted from the epistolary novel by Bob Randall, but an all-new story. One that was adapted from an entirely different novel written by Peter Abrahams, but just so happened to have the same title.

Robert De Niro plays Gil Renard, a baseball obsessed loser with anger management issues and an oh-so-tenuous grasp on reality. While a pre-Blade Wesley Snipes gets tasked with playing Bobby Rayburn, the embodiment, and thus the brutal focus, of Renard's obsessions and frustrations. 

Rayburn has hit a slump just as Renard's life starts to spiral out of whatever semblance of control it had remaining. Psychosis infused shenanigans ensue.

But what proved most memorable about this film was the scene where De Niro's character has make a "quick trip" from Candlestick (which was still standing at that point) over to Oakland, for a disastrous sales meeting, and back via the Bay Bridge. Somehow taking the same Oakland bound route in both directions...
 

The Frighteners (1996) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner - July 14, 1996]

As much as I would have loved to have gone and seen The Frighteners on the big screen, it was released at a time when such luxuries were out of reach.

When I finally was able to catch up to the film when it hit home video, I thought it was a tad unfocused and all over the place. The organizational threads of story and character seemed to have gotten tangled with the distractions of the massive amounts of special effects.

While Jackson was aiming for a PG-13 rating, it became clear that the MPAA, for whatever reason, did not want the film to have that rating. No matter the amount of cuts and alterations made. So Jackson amped up the gore for one character's death, just so the R rating felt earned rather than arbitrary.

This one movie I need to revisit sooner, rather than later.

Dracula (1979) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner - July 8, 1979]

Thanks in very large part to the massive success of the Edward Gorey designed revival of the Dean/Balderston penned play, both on Broadway and as a national tour, Universal dusted off the gothic horror property that launched its famous monster line-up and released this "all-new" cinematic version of the classic story in 1979.

There were also three or four Dracula movies that came out during the summer of 1979, depending on whether or not you count (heh, "count") Werner Herzog's Noserfatu the Vampyre. Love at First Bite, a rom-com take on Dracula that starred George Hamilton as the Count, preceded this film's release by 3 or so months. The 7 Brothers Meet Dracula, a delayed by five or so years retitled release of Hammer Film's Legend of the 7 Golden Vampires, would open the Wednesday before this film's release.

Because the movie looked "old" to me, in that it was set in the 19th century and 12 year-old me preferred movies and stories set in time periods with electricity, indoor plumbing, and motor cars, I was disinterested in seeing this on the big screen. Too bad for younger me.

I did catch up on during a Halloween night sleepover with a whole bunch of friends. An independent pay TV outlet had an awesome marathon lined up. What I remember being shown that night was the animated film Wizards (1977), followed by The Amityville Horror (1979), Halloween (1978), The Fog (1980) and Dracula (1979). There may come a time when I might be able to fact check this, by checking the Oakland Tribune's TV listings, but who knows if, or when, that will ever occur.
 

Jaws (1975) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner]

June 11, 1975

This teaser ad hyping the upcoming release of Jaws is one of what, at time of typing these very words, is close to ten or so dozen examples of why I started looking at every page of an archived paper. Because this teaser was not nestled with all the other movie ads in the Entertainment Section. No, this ad was 'hidden' in either the Business or Sports section. Or between to two. Just so eyes that might not bother checking the Entertainment Section might see and take note of it.

I have no idea when the very first teaser ad for Jaws appeared in either the San Francisco Examiner or the Oakland Tribune. But, since I am going through every available edition archived ad Newspapers.com, I should be able to find and archive it here. It is my favorite movie of all time, after all.

Ghostbusters (1984) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner]

June 3, 1984

Ivan Reitman and Dan Ackroyd, with the assist of Bill Murray, Sigourney Weaver, Rick Moranis, and an almost unacknowledged Ernie Hudson, captured lightning in a bottle that, despite numerous repeat attempts, was never truly been recaptured.

This might have been my favorite film of the summer of 1984, although it did receive stiff competition from the even darker and actually scary at times Gremlins. Which just so happened to have been released on the very same weekend as Ghostbusters.

I was visiting friends and family in the states at the time, which meant I got to see it during its theatrical run while it was enjoying massive business and the Southland Cinema in Hayward. At least that is where I remember seeing it.
 

Invaders from Mars (1986) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner]

June 1, 1986

I was on summer break from SFSU, and thus in Hong Kong, when Invaders from Mars was released at selected theaters and drive-ins to a less than spectacular reception from both audiences and critics. So I missed out on seeing it on the big screen. Which is too bad, as I thought it was a nifty 'little' movie when I saw it on home video.

While not as chaotically bonkers as Hooper's delightful cult classic Lifeforce, which had cratered at the box office the year before, Invaders from Mars, despite looking and feeling ever so slightly choppy and uneven, has a colorful charm and a dreamlike sense of wonder to it. Elements that make it pair really well with Joe Dante's 1985 box office flop Explorers, which also, despite looking and feeling ever so slightly choppy and uneven, has the same kind of colorful charm and dreamlike sense of wonder to it as Invaders from Mars.

I think this movie is well worth seeing for the Martian ship set design, the Stan Winston creatures, and Daniel Pearl's gorgeous cinematography. There was an interesting essay, that was attributed to director Tobe Hooper, that was in John Russo's book Making Movies. It detailed some of the baffling meddling Hooper had to contend with while making this movie and should be sought out and read.

One anecdote I heard was that Golan/Globus, and the Cannon Group, were disappointed that the film was not scary enough. They wanted a scary monster movie, an alien invasion variation of Poltergeist. But Hooper was intent on making more of an E.T. style adventure.

And I think it succeeded, for the most part. This is one of those movies I really wished had done better at that box office. It would have been great if it had at least broken even at the box office and not lost a ton of cash for the struggling studio/distributor.

Alien (1979) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner]

May 20, 1979

San Francisco got an exclusive 'early' engagement. Meanwhile, in the East Bay, I had to suffer an eternity of eager anticipation for the movie to open in June and actually see it, I think, in mid-July. Worth the wait.

But it still seemed to take forever to finally get to see it...
 

The Amityville Horror (1979) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner - July 22, 1979]

While I remember the theatrical release of The Amityville Horror film adaptation, I did not see it on the big screen. I did read the paperback, though. Several times, in fact. I also remember the debunking the haunting got on the show That's Incredible!

Perhaps there was a time I believed the story, or just wanted to believe the story was real. But that time has long passed.

Orca (1977) - Newspaper Ad [Oakland Tribune - July 13, 1977]

Dino De Laurentiis followed his 1976 remake of King Kong with Orca, a blatant attempt at crafting a Jaws-sized hit at the box office.

Although not what one would call a critical or artistic success, Orca did manage to break even at the box office. I know I saw it at least twice on the big screen in the summer of 1977. I just loved the idea of a super smart killer whale crushing the collective asses of those responsible for the death of its mate and child.

The movie also instigated a comical pissing contest with Jaws. Orca kicks off with the titular beast dispatching a great white shark in spectacular fashion. A year later Jaws 2 would feature a scene involving a dead, shark-bit killer whale that has washed ashore. If franchise entries could talk, then Jaws 2 was sneering, "Bitch, please..."

Jaws the Revenge (1987) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner - July 12, 1987]

Oof. I went to see the very first matinee screening of Jaws the Revenge at the Alhambra Theatre on Friday, July 17th. Why? Because Jaws is my favorite movie of all time and, back then, I had the energy to give just about any movie a try.

There was a small group of people a few rows behind me that, before the movie started, joked about how this movie could not be worse than the previous Sea World set entry. They were wrong, of course. So very, very wrong.

This was also the first time a movie snapped me out of a fog of denial regarding what I was watching. To this day I vividly remember the moment when the film cut to a lackluster shot of the mechanical shark flopping in the water and I thought, "That's right, this a Jaws movie." The shock, dismay, and utter horror that washed over me as I realized that I had forgotten what movie I was supposed to be watching was physically palpable and soul crushing.

I also remember the slack-jawed walk of shame and resentment at being seen leaving the theatre after this comically inept abomination had ended.

At least I got to see the film's original ending on the big screen.

Alien (1979) - Newspaper Ad [Oakland Tribune - June 17, 1979]

A month or so after its exclusive San Francisco screenings began unspooling at the Northpoint, Alien finally opened at theaters and drive-ins closer to me. I am pretty sure that we saw it at the Hayward Festival.

Poltergeist III (1988) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner - June 5, 1988]

Saw this at the Empire Cinema, which is where I worked, for a time. But I do not think I was working there when Poltergeist III came out. 

Here we have a prime example of what, I believe, Carl Gottlieb referred to as the Immutable Rule of the Sequel. "Only the last one loses money."

Poltergeist II The Other Side might have made some money, but that money was nowhere near as much as the first Poltergeist. I think the first sequel only made a third of what the first film did.

But it made enough money to warrant yet another trip to the box office, just to see how much (or little) they could squeeze out of the franchise.

Poltergeist III had two knocks against it, right out of the gate. The first being star Heather O'Rourke dying shortly after the end of principle photography. That cast a saddening shadow that the movie had no way of getting out from under.

Second was the absence of any and all post-production visual effects. No costly Industrial Light and Magic wizardry was to be displayed here. All the effects were done on set and in camera, through sleight of hand trickery, body doubles, and mirror work.

In theory, and on paper, the idea works. On the big screen, though... Well, it neither looked nor felt the same. I did not dislike the film, though. I even thought, at the time, that it was superior and more fun to watch than Poltergeist II The Other Side.

I cannot say that it was all that good, though. Poltergeist III is just an interesting and entertaining failure at trying to do something different. 

Visiting Hours (1982) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner - May 26, 1982]

Here we have an ad hyping the upcoming release of a cheesy slice of slasher Canuxploitation. One that stars Lee Grant and William Shatner, of all people. Third-billed Michael Ironside plays the misogynistic killer. Fourth-billed Linda Purl is a sympathetic nurse, and single mother, that distracts the killer in order to pad out the film's runtime.

While this did screen at Alameda's Southshore Cinema, I was unable to see it on the big screen. This was a home video rental or an HBO watch for me.

The Dark Half (1993) - Newspaper Ad [Oakland Tribune - April 18, 1993]

I was super excited at being able to see The Dark Half  at a 'sneak preview' screening held at the Alexandria Theater in San Francisco. But the muted and indifferent reaction of the packed house proved to be a dire foreshadowing of the film's lackluster performance at the box office.

Which was too bad, as I liked the film and hoped it would be successful. Not to be, though. So it goes.

The Godsend (1980) - Newspaper Ad [Oakland Tribune - March 5, 1980]

I find it rather amusing that I have a far stronger memory of seeing Bernard Taylor's source novel in the spinner racks or shelves of our local retailers than of this film adaptation's theatrical release at our local theater.

Like yesterday's The Bad Seed, The Godsend is a gap in my reading and viewing that may or may not ever be filled in.

John Stanley's review of the film in his Revenge of the Creature Features Movie Guide describes The Godsend as "a fair British horror film focusing on psychological aspects rather than grisly details." That sounds promising. Maybe I should watch this on a double-bill with Cathy's Curse? Just a thought.

I also pulled Grady Hendrix's Paperbacks from Hell off my TBR mountain and gave it a thumb through, hoping there might be something to share. Nope. The paperback cover is shown without zero comment or critique. So it goes.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984) - Newspaper Ad [San Francisco Examiner - November 11, 1984]

I was living overseas, in Hong Kong, when A Nightmare on Elm Street was released in the United States in November of 1984. So I have zero memories of it as a theatrical release or viewing experience. Never saw the poster hanging in a lobby, nor did I see any TV spots for it. Because I was not there. So it goes.

It was not until Fangoria's 43rd issue arrived in the mail and I read a letter in The Postal Zone that praised a film called A Nightmare on Elm Street for creating an ultimate boogeyman that I became aware of its existence. What was this movie with a villain the letter writer deemed capable of scaring Jason Voorhees himself?

This praise both intrigued me and made me anxious to see this "ultimate boogeyman" film. Which I was able to in, I believe, the Thanksgiving weekend of 1985. When I rented the movie on home video. It not only managed to scare the shit out of me, but it also kept me awake that night. As I was afraid to fall asleep.

Something that would not happen again until, 25 years later, an opening night viewing of Paranormal Activity rendered me too scared to sleep. Good times.